Gossip [&] the Devil

inside the DIY ARTBOOK project :: drawings by Natascha Peiser

No one gets into this business to make money. If you’ve succumbed to an artists calling you’re admitting you’re willing to spend your life in poverty and constant question from those around you who just don’t get it. DIY labors are born of love, dedication and a drive you can’t quite explain. Sometimes your faith shakes, cries and downright denies its ability to continue. But you do, because you must and because there are others who believe in you.

Natascha Peiser is one of these people. In a recent interview with Silverthorn Press, Natascha said: ” I´m a self-taught artist. I am learning by doing.”

A art-liver in her own right she’s been a fan and friend of G[&]D nearly since the beginning, finding a home among the Modern Orphan mantra and supporting however she could, much to my appriceation. This is how we came together, though an entire ocean separates us (She lives in Hamburg, Germany). This is the power of art and the humanities. Two like minds, suffering and surviving for their art, striving to carve a small place for our own works in the vast expanse of the universe.

When she began work on her DIY ARTBOOK project I admired her and indeed planned on purchasing one when she was through. I was excited she had decided to pursue her art in some fashion for she’s quite a remarkable sketch artist; she’s even been endorsed by the likes of Amanda Palmer. When she asked me to contribute I was honored and some time later sent her some handwritten, typed and burned up works of poetry to be included among its decorated pages. The result is her very first book project, which she’s proudly finished and set for sale today.

inside the DIY ARTBOOK project :: drawings by Natascha, words by yours truly

This is a genuine labor of love–love for art, love for preservation and the unshakable belief that there is something more to these endeavors we pursue than sheer vanity and ego, that these things can forge connections across oceans and modes of thinking. You can purchase the DIY ARTBOOK featuring Natascha and myself here in her webstore for only $10, which includes free international shipping. Don’t forget all of my works featured in the DIY ARTBOOK can also be found in my first chapbook, The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance available through modern.orphan.designs. for $10 as well, including shipping. Independent art is alive and well! Modern Orphans unite!

inside the DIY ARTBOOK :: art and words by yours truly :: soon for sale at modernorphandesigns.com

Troubadour 21 :: The “My Brother Billy” Series and Upcoming Interviews

I touched on this in the last post but I’ll expand just a little further with this one. Troubadour 21 has aptly named  my series”My Brother Billy”–  an out-of-order, sexually charged, angsty series I created over two years ago on the shores of the Gulf of Mexico when I was looking for a new muse to guide me during a particularly dark and troubled time. They are stories of a twenty-something girl, her much older brother and her love interest, Nathaniel. They’ve recieved rave reviews from the editors of T21 and as a result I’ve been contracted to write a story a week for them to continue the series. I hope to publish them all in book form one day and , in all honesty, this excercise is forcing me to write during this writing drought I’m experiencing and so I thank them from the bottom of my heart for giving me a chance.

Lead Article featuring my “Billy” series by Editor Paquita Roth

And, in case you missed them, here are parts I through III of the series–take a taste and see for yourself:

Part I :: Living Under Glass
Part II :: The Inquisition
Part III :: The Invention of Hopeless Beach

Part IV will be posted soon and I’ll make sure to keep them updated as best I can on here, including links on the side bar for easy access. If you enjoy them, please share them with your friends and help me achieve a readers choice status!

Also, in the spirit of crossing art borders and in G[&]D breaking news, I have upcoming interviews with the authors of the forthcoming poetry and photography book, Flowers + Filth: Rock photographer Lisa Johnson and William Francis of Aiden! Look for those in the near future, as well as my interview with Kill Hannah’s newest touring guitarist, Maddox, coming as soon as he has a break from tour! Get ready to feast your eyeballs on deliciousness with these. I’m super jazzed about working with such talented and well-spoken individuals.

It has been a bleak month creatively and will likely continue into a bleak November, but on this Devil’s Night it’s forever important to remember that while pressing on is the last thing you want to do, it is essential. For if we do not fight to keep these things alive, if we do not create the art needed to bind human beings to one another, no one else will. Unique is the person willing to take on the burden, and the blessing, of being an artist. Keep being brave, dear Orphans.

P.S. If you’re in Tulsa this coming Tuesday I’ll be reading from The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance at the Gypsy Coffee House [303 N Cincinnati Ave, Tulsa, OK 74103] starting around 8pm – come, grab some great lattes and open your ears. Copies of my book will be available at this time as well!

Its been a long while since I’ve updated on what I’m doing with my writing. Truth be told I’m in the middle of a black writer’s block, but I’ve tried to stay busy. A tiny rundown:

• I’ve submitted a micro-fiction about bipolar disorder called “You, Me and Matthew Makes Three” to a journal called The Vestal Review.
• Reviewed Quick Fiction for Common-Line magazine this month.
• I wrote my first poem in months after an afternoon of Amanda Palmer and coffee.
• I’ve taken on a weekly series Troubadour 21 has named “My Brother Billy,” which is keeping me writing every week.

I’m finding out the harsh realities of being a professional writer, realizing that every piece of work you put out isn’t always going to be french kissed by the muse. As a friend told me this weekend though, sometimes you’ve just got to let it go and let it be what it’s going to be. Sometimes you just don’t have all the variables in place to work like you want to work, you just don’t have the time. You do the best you can and that’s that.

Right now it’s all I can do to write these few sentences, but picking them now is better than letting them rot on the vine.

Orphans, how do you get that cold bitch to put out when you’re needing to create?

The Flaming Lips, September 2009 (Photo by R. E. Barbash)

Photography is only recently coming into its own as an art form. But photography has cemented a place in the arts for some of the same reasons as painting: preservation. Two different sets of eyes using the same camera will capture different results. We are allowed a view from someone else’s perspective. Photographers freeze moments we’ll treasure forever; whether it’s that special magic during a show or your children running in the park, photography can grab a fistful of what the human eye must let go.

Rachael Barbash has been capturing the insanity at concerts for years, and many fans turn to her website to re-live the memories. While still a student at Columbia State Community College she’s logged countless experience and face time.

Rachael stubbornly pursues her dream despite making little to no money doing what she loves. The hundreds of photos she posts to her Flickr account are free for people to take and use. But, like musicians or painters she considers herself an important part of the humanities.

In the days when every 14-year-old in the world has a digital camera, what separates her from the masses who want photo passes and recognition on the scene? What separates those who do it for art vs. those who are hobbyists?  Rachael sheds some light on the subject below when I asked her a few questions about what makes photography an art form.

Years shooting: 7

Sign: Aries

Julie M. Tate: We’ll start easy. First band you ever shot?

R. E. Barbash: I was kind of late to come to the concert scene since I was a bit of a homebody in high school and lacked any serious form of transportation.  Once I left for college I started going to shows pretty regularly.  The first band I ever shot while performing was OKGo in 2001 with a little 35mm disposable camera.  Once I got a more professional camera, a 35mm Canon SLR, the first band I shot was Kill Hannah who was performing at an outdoor festival at Ohio State, where I was going to school at the time. I finally got my first digital SLR, a Canon Rebel, before the 2006 South by Southwest festival in Austin, TX. Thousands of band play there every year and is an amazing experience.

Kill Hannah, September 2009 (Photo By R. E. Barbash)

JMT: Who have been some of the easiest bands to shoot live? The hardest?

REB: By far the easiest band I’ve shot is Kill Hannah, partly because I’ve been to so many of their shows but also because their stage presence is probably the most engaging I’ve ever seen.  Recently I shot the Flaming Lips who were also amazing.

The hardest bands to photograph have definitely been on the recent Alternative Press tours (Mayday Parade, the Academy is…, Set Your Goals, You Me At Six and the Secret Handshake).  The guys never seem to take a pause and are just constantly running around the stage.  The kids at these shows are crazy though! Very fun.

JMT: What makes a band easy or difficult to photograph?

REB: It’s much easier to photograph a band if you know their music.  That way you can sort of guess what they’re going to do on stage and how a crowd might react to a song but you don’t always have that advantage.  I’ve shot some bands who just sound like noise (no matter how poppy they actually are) and I can’t guess their next move.  I’ll end up at the wrong side of the stage at the wrong time and miss amazing moments of their act.  Also, bands who look like they’re having fun and engage the audience area always the most enjoyable to shoot.

Innerpartysystem, January 2009 (Photo by R. E. Barbash)

JMT: You’ve been capturing concerts for years. I’m sure music had an impact on your life outside of the lens as well. Do you consider yourself an artist? If so, how has music in particular shaped the artist you are today, and who are some of your favorite artists personally? If not, what does photography do for you?

REB: More than an artist, I think of myself as capturing what’s already there and trying to show the beauty of the world.  What I photograph most regularly is live shows so music has been a huge part of my life.  I love catching what happens on stage and the interaction between the performer and their fans.  I love so many bands but my favorite musicians are the Smashing Pumpkins, IAMX, Radiohead, Muse, Thursday, Interpol, Rasputina, Emilie Autumn, The Dresden Dolls, local guys Flotation Walls and, of course, the bands Kill Hannah and Shiny Toy Guns who pretty much taught me to use my camera by shooting them so often.  As far as visual art goes I love the work of Kyle Cassidy, a documentary and portrait photographer, Pete Souza, the White House photographer, and digital artist Natalie Shau.  As the photographers go, their work really inspires me because they capture real life but show it at a different angle.  Show ordinary things in a new light.

JMT: Favorite photographers?

REB: It’ll sound corny but my favorite photo ever by another artist is probably this photo of the Obamas:

Most of my favorite photos have a very big photo journalistic aspect to them and Pete Souza is one of the best documentary photographers out there.  Other favorites are Kyle Cassidy, Kristen Burns, Philip Warner and Akif Hakan Celebi. As well, there are very talented photographers who are also in my photo program at CSCC.  I can’t wait to see what they do in the future.

JMT: What tends to catch your eye in a natural setting?

REB: While I have done some studio photography, most of my photos not taken at shows have come from random moments throughout the day, which is why I try to always have a camera with me.  Usually the way lights hit an object or just the ambiance of a scene.

Untitled (Photo by R. E. Barbash)

JMT: Is there a place in the arts for things like studio work or is that merely a means to an artistic end? (I.E. getting paid)

REB: I think if you think of yourself as an artist, then you’re an artist.  If you think of yourself as a corporate slave then that’s what you are.  Even photographers at Wal-Mart family portrait studios can have some artistic input to their shots.  Though most of my favorite photographers are actually more on the documentary side of things.  Beautiful things can be made out of ordinary every day scenes.  For example, just the other day, undeveloped negatives by street photographer Vivian Maier were just unveiled and I was captivated for hours looking at her photos of Chicago in the 1950s.  If this is your thing and you’re lucky, maybe you’ll get hired on by a magazine or newspaper.  But mostly photography is done for yourself.

JMT: To me, photography is akin to a poem in that it captures a point in time that you can never get back. Especially considering the way I write, a poem can be a little picture made of words and vice versa. There’s a beautiful marriage that happens when two art forms cross over. Considering books like the upcoming Flowers + Filth by photographer Lisa Johnson and lyricist wiL Francis, they can be put together to make a compelling and unique piece of art. Have you ever considered doing something of the sort

REB: That’s similar to Who Killed Amanda Palmer, the book. Photos and words can always work together.

The Shiny Toy Guns, April 2009 (Photo by R. E. Barbash)

JMT: Much like music testifies to a time or paintings reflect it’s surroundings, what is photography’s place in preserving our culture and why is it important?

REB: As far as preserving our culture, photography can not only capture events but it can show someone’s individual view of the world. Even though photography has been around for more than a hundred years it’s just beginning to be respected as an art form. Whether it’s a set up scene or documenting an event an exact scene happen again or be seen the same way by different eyes.  It’s important to freeze the moment so others can see what was there.

R. E. Barbash (Photo credit: Unknown)

(For more information visit R. E. Barbash Photography. Rachael currently attends CSCC.)

As an artist you take on certain responsibilities financially, mentally and creatively. Personally this book drained every one of those wells to nothing, helping to leave me in a hospital bed [no shit] on life support and hoping it would all work out.

It has.

With the release of this book  I can say it has. Even if it sells a million copies. Even if it sells two. [I'm shooting for ten.] When I lost my notion of what a writer “should be” and how they should be presented, when I decided that going in house was an actual possibility, when I realized that my professors were likely right – I was never going to get a traditional book deal proper, that’s when it worked out. Because I gave up, took a chance and gave it a name: The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance.

The guts of The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance.

From my very first publication in Papyrus to my first official contract with the Great American Poetry Show every bit of work that led me where I am today is featured in this book. Don’t want to hunt down copies of journals you don’t care about or ones that are out of print? Now you don’t have to. The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance is a three year journey from college, to the road, to shows, to being homeless, addicted and back again. It’s the tale and twisted emotions that happen when you fall in love with a muse, a boy, a girl or yourself. It’s the ups and downs, the loves and lusts, drugs, lefts, rights and all alones.

At Gossip [&] the Devil I’ve read the riot act on supporting the arts and the idea that the humanities cannot die unless we let them, unless we STOP creating. This will never happen. There will always be artists, outcasts, those with that calling for which they’ll be blacklisted for life. It’s the INTEREST. We have to WANT to read poetry, classic and current literature, go to museums, paint pictures, participate in school music programs, pay to see live shows and take photographs to capture that micro-moment that would have otherwise been lost.

I won’t get into the full story of The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance. So many people say “have you heard the one about the struggling artist?” and so many respond with “next.” But they ARE unique stories, MINE is a unique story just as YOURS will be too. This is why I ask you to at least read this review, my very first book review for my very first chapbook, my life blood, more than the shirts, oils, jewelry, glamour, jetsetting, pills, brown eyed boys or twittering piano players. This is the culmination of all that.

Editor for Troubadour 21, W. B. Burkholder’s review of The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance

G[&]D has been live less than a year and it’s already amassed a following stronger than I could have ever imagined. From the UK to Germany, to California to New York I’ve had people write and tell me “thank you” for doing what I do. As an artist that’s what you work for. I’ve had people stop me at shows to tell me they loved my work. I never imagined something like this could happen and yet, here it is, the result of lots of hard work and heartache on both my end and yours, for I don’t believe you can enjoy anything I write without knowing what a bit of heartache feels like. It’s the hope it’ll pass that separates us from those that wallow in their black holes. We have faith the arts will adopt us and accept us into it’s womb of knowledge and comfort, a place where we can feel safe. Never forget, We are Modern Orphans.

Visiting countries to Gossip (&) the Devil so far.

Click here to go to [modern.orphan.designs.] and purchase your copy of The Rough Chronicles of Bipolar Romance for $10 [US] or $13 [international] all with shipping included.

I’ll be honest. I haven’t submitted to anything print in a long, long time, save the Columbia Poetry Review (who have a history of rejecting me, but I’m hopeful this time). I’ve felt like writing but nothing decent is hitting the paper. I think I’m getting out the dust and mold before the clean work comes. Cracking my creative bones.

In the meantime, I conducted a short interview with the rock photographer Lisa Johnson the other day, which I’ll post later when it’s closer to the release of her collaborative effort with wiL Francis, Flowers + Filth. Lisa has shot some of the biggest bands in history, captured chaos all across warped tour, but I won’t get into that until the write-up. I have contacted wiL as well, but since he’s just had a baby I’m not sure his schedule will allow.

I was fortunate enough to see U2 and Muse in Dallas this past Monday. Two iconic and epic bands, for separate reasons, together in the same huge, tin room. The show was a trip for my birthday back in April as well as my roommates way of getting me to see U2 since she’s been singing their praises since I moved in. I’ve never seen Muse before and what I walked away with was yes, they’re very good performers but because you can tell they do the performance a lot. They played “Map of the Problematique” which was the only song I’d asked for and they didn’t play “Knights of Cydonia” which was the only song I asked not to play. So it was a win all around.

U2 was pretty unbelievable. Everyone said Bono was a priest and I’m inclined to believe them after what I saw. He’d say “raise your hands” and you’d think you were in church. There was a man next to me so enraptured I’m not sure the smile left his face the entire show. At one point Bono quieted the entire band while the crowd sang “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” and I wondered, as I mumbled along with the believers, how that must feel to have so many thousands of people say your words back. How could that ever get old? I saw sisters, brothers, boyfriends, girlfriends and parents hugging each other during various songs. The crowd didn’t have a mean bone in it’s body, they just wanted Pastor Bono, The Edge, Larry and Adam to deliver them from real life for two hours, where they could hug and feel safe doing so, where a smile didn’t come barbed with guilt. Since it was their “360 degree tour” their big pile of “space junk” went around the arena so there wasn’t a bad seat in the house.

Not in dallas, but you get the idea. No clue who took this. Email if offended.

The acoustic “Stuck in a Moment” with Bono and The Edge was a personal highlight for me, where I discovered The Edge had a very nice singing voice and that the song resonated with me in such a way that I was forced to tears. But, as he evangelized, “it’s just a moment, this time shall pass.” I’m sure I’ll write more about this later, but I thought I should at least mention it since it impacted me in a way I”m not used to.

After the show a marathon 8 hour drive home because of concert traffic and we landed back in Tulsa at 8am, just in time for my roommate to go to work. I’d ask her occasionally if it was worth it. She always said the same thing: “Yes.” If you can answer “yes” to those question about the things you do in your life, regardless of what comes, you’re headed in the right direction.